My journey back to freedom.

By Minerva

I married at 26. I thought I was getting married for life. I didn't expect my husband to become abusive. Sometimes people ask "Why did you marry him then?" well, I did not know what was going to happen.

As time went by, he became very controlling. He wanted to know where I had been, who with...he would listen to my phone calls, and read my diary. Later, he hit me for the first time. I was so scared. I was shaking and could't believe it was happening to me. Hitting me became part of my life. Once he kicked me really hard because I was 15 minutes late from work. I saw him outside my workplace several times. I didn't know what to do. When I was 30, I had a baby. It was supposed to be a happy time. He started to use the baby to make me suffer. He would say things such as "I will take the baby and you will never see him again". He isolated me from family and friends. I had no job, no money. I was totally dependent on him financially. He became even more controlling and the physical abuse escalated.

I became so depressed. I didn't think life was worth living. I went to the Doctor and he said I had a depressive disorder. I hated the word "disorder". It made me feel that I was going mad or was already crazy. I felt mental.

I went to the Police Station once and asked to talk to a police officer about a protection order. They asked me to wait because they were busy. I waited 1 and a half hour and decided to leave because no one would even tell me when they were going to see me.

I called the Police another day and they came to my house. I told them what was going on. The physical abuse, the threats...they said it was not enough to get a protection order! I was so angry. I felt so dismissed.

One day I left. I had the courage to tell a friend of mine what was happening for me and why I had stop seeing her. She was very supportive. She gave me a place to stay until I found alternative accommodation. He continued to harass me through phone, until I got the protection order. I never saw him again. He never showed any interest in seeing his son. I was glad. I didn't want my son to grow up to be like him. Now, I am not afraid to go home any more.